How do people manage it?

So how do people manage the whole being the "perfect" housewife mixed with young children? Is this really possible or just a myth? I'm hoping it's just a myth. No matter how much I try and keep on top of things it just doesn't work. The oldest one in preschool 5 mornings, number 2 child is at preschool 3 mornings a week but still that leaves me entertaining an 11month old who if I'm lucky will take an 15 minute nap sometime around 11am so where do you juggle house work end of the day? I've been worn out by the kids and just want to chill or go to the gym when the kids are in bed?
 My theory on things is that right now my priority is my children who are still quite reliant on me even if they fight for their independence daily. Soon enough they will all be at school giving me the time I want to clean and tidy and long for the these days of having my princesses by my side  . There really is no winning.
Anyway back to my problem how do people cope with being a housewife and mother of young children? Is it just normal to put the housework on hold for a few years and just do the basics to keep the house tidy, all the  family feed and have clean clothes or is there a way to clean out the cupboards and wash windows hoover under all the furniture and fold fitted sheets properly (I don't think I'll ever be able to do that). 

My CHALLENGE OF THE WEEK:  a time audit  to see how I waste my time and  feel guilty for time wasting rather than what I haven't got round too.  Let's see how this goes how much of my 24 hours do I waste. Once I know that then we can move on to replacing time wasting activities with more productive ones.